This morning, Braden woke up with QUITE the vocabulary. He said all sorts of new words such as "Uh-Oh (so cute), and Daddy"and he learned where his nose and ears are. It was very cute. I think Uh-oh is my favorite phrase to teach a baby. Tonight, we had a little family "game night". Daddy's leaving on Sunday & even though we'll see him on weekends, he'll be gone to NCO academy for 6 weeks. BINGO was the game chosen, and I think the kids had fun. Zane usually gets a little ANTZY mid-way thru, but we managed to get in three games before bedtime.
Bree and I had a serious conversation today. She was trying to tell me she needs "alone" time without Zane and Braden. Here's the transcript:
Bree: Mommy, I don't know how to say it without you thinking t it will sound like I don't love my brothers.
Me: Just tell me baby, I'm listening.
Bree: Well, I'm just tired of taking care of Zane and Braden. I mean I love them both very much, but I get tired of babysitting them and getting them breakfast. And why do I have to share all my toys. (she tears up at this point)
I assure her that just because she doesn't want to HELP with the boys, it doesn't mean she doesn't love them. She's such a sweetheart. I told her I gave her such responsibility because at one time SHE WANTED to do alot for the boys. So we agreed that if she didn't want to have to fix Zane cereal in the morning, then she couldn't get any either until I was out of bed. Bree & Zane get up very very early and often want breakfast right away sometimes at 6:00 am. I've trained them to wait/play quietly in their rooms until around 7 or 8 when Braden and I wake up. Anyway, it was a very SERIOUS conversation. We set many things in place, including "free time" for her, where she could go into her own room, and not be disturbed by the boys, to play with her own toys, listen to music, ect. I told her Daddy and I would reduce her "chores" involving care of Zane and Braden. She's usually the "fetcher" and I don't want her to end up resenting the boys because we've asked her to take on a "supervisory" responsibility of them. She told me she just wants to "have fun" with the boys, not take care of them. It was heavy, and it broke my heart a little. I hope I always take time to listen to our children. She needed to be heard, and this matter needed to be corrected. I told her parents aren't perfect, and it the same way "she" gets tired from responsibility, adults get tired too. But we don't stop loving our children, just the way she doesn't stop loving her brothers. However, she is a child. I did take away some of her chores, but she actually insisted on a few FUN chores. Here's the way she looks at it. Chores are FUN, if they are NEW responsibilities. She still has to care for her dog, and I told her very soon Zane would be taking on more chores as he gets more mature to carry them out. We also discussed an allowance of $4 per week. She is such a great little helper that sometimes I probably take advantage of her. And I do NOT want to do that! She has to be a child, and it's my job to make sure she is a child, regardless of how many chores she "begs to do". Anyway, just thought I'd share this humbling experience. Bree is such a gift. I will try to remember that I have legs, and before I rush to say, "Bree can you bring me this..." try to remember, that she will without complaining fetch me what I need, but what do I want her spending her time doing - being a sister and a helper, or being a kid?
It's hard when your child calls you on something, and I'm sure this is one of many times it will happen, but I thank God for open communication, and sweet willing-heart children. I hope I am humble enough to listen when they truly need to tell me I'm doing something wrong. I thank God for her honesty and her beautiful spirit. We are truly blessed!
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